Dance & Etiquette

One of the most important things to know in Victorian society was good etiquette. Both men and women had their own set of rules of etiquette. There was a rule of etiquette for almost everything you did in a day.

For women, there were rules about what kind of jewelry one should wear as well as when and where. Who to walk with, who to dance with, how and when to speak to a stranger, were all very critical knowledge.

For men, there were rules about bowing, hat tipping, chaperonage, where to sit and next to whom, even about the circumstances in which it was correct or not to smoke or drink in front of ladies.

There was also a correct title for almost every type of profession, social standing and rank.

Dances

One of the major events in upper class society was the dance. Dances were usually scheduled to correspond with the full moon.

Even most great houses did not have very large ballrooms. As a consequence, most balls were held outdoors. Most dances started around eight o'clock or so and the light of the full moon allowed less lighting to have to be put up.

The practice was often to have the hostess and her daughters greet guests at the front door. Floral decorations were popular in the 1850's and 60's, but by the 1890's, too much decoration was frowned upon.

At the 'top' of the room, usually the area farthest away from the door, was the band. The best dances had a cornet, piano, violin, and a cello during the 1850's.

Occasionally, in order to make everyone's life easier, dance cards were written out. These were small cards upon which guests wrote which dances they preferred.

The dances were not without their down side however. Wax quite frequently dripped from the candelabras and chandeliers onto the dancers. Some of the wilder dances entailed such mad sorties across the floor that cavalry officers were warned not to wear spurs, and there is at least one instance of a lady slamming into another and having her jewelry cut open her arm!